Face the Facts

I have been reminded several times this year that I can’t trust my feelings. My feelings are often based on matters of the heart and they cloud my judgement so I must Face the Facts. As twisted as it sounds, the fact is that my feelings have been hurt.

The facts give you a firm grasp of what you are up against so you can figure out how to effectively move forward. When you are building, growing, elevating, transitioning, you often feel delayed, behind, and overlooked. I have found that the Lord gives me ‘Path Pavers‘ and I fiddle to my goals, and over time I have learned to get back to the facts and not make moves based off of my feelings.

We search for feedback as we strive to reach our goals. That feedback is the news or the update on how we are progressing and we have to use discernment to separate the facts and the feelings.

Facing the Facts:

No news is bad news. If you don’t know what you are up against, then you cannot be effective. You need the facts, the root of the situation and an understanding of what the outcome should be. You don’t know where you stand if there is no news, and that’s bad.

Bad news is good news. It’s all in how you view a thing. Once I started looking at bad news as growth and opportunity to do better, increase, learn more… it quickly transitioned into good news.

Good news is no news. Just means you did the thing the right way. That you have a grasp on the facts, and you understood and met the goal.

Our feelings should be acknowledged, tracked back to the fact they are tied to and properly dealt with, but not be the driving force behind our actions. Learn the power in a pause. Watch how things change as you base decisions less off of emotion and more off of facts!

#BecomeAVictor

#SDG

Hold Yourself Accountable

Accountable. Responsible. Obedient. Believe. These words are all one in the same to me. You must take ownership of your situation in your life. If you are an entrepreneur, or in management at your company, you must take ownership of your situation there. As people, we own the work that we do and the path that we take. You must believe in yourself. If something in your area of responsibility is broken, no matter what it may be, you should quickly take steps to fix it.

We all have dreams. What we have to remember is that the dream is OURS. That we hold the responsibility for making those dreams come true. We can have a support system, but ultimately it is our responsibility to make the dream come true. A huge part of believing in the dream is believing in yourself. You can achieve it, if you believe it.

Often the best and most rewarding decision you can make is to stay the course even when it would be simpler to turn and walk away. You have to find a system that works for you. You also have to have accountability partners. In this 38th year of my life, I finally have that all worked out. My partners are the sweetest, kindest people I know and they softly speak to my soul with encouragement. Words of affirmation and kind acts are my love language, so this system works well for me.

Let’s be honest, it is also a great help to have someone that believes in you while you chase your dreams. Someone that will sing your hearts song back to you when the going gets tough. I have previously posted “Friends?” I am convinced that we are not meant to do life alone. It is not always our qualifications on paper that help us get to the things we want to do, there are people we network with that pull or push us along.

Believe in yourself enough for the impossible to occur. Be accountable to yourself, to your dreams. Don’t let YOU back off from doing the things you want to do, qualified or not. Period!

#SDG

Baby Steps

I am fortunate enough to attend Central Missionary Baptist Church of Detroit, MI where, Robert E. Bolden, I, is Pastor. Currently our Midweek Oasis (Tuesday night Bible class) Series is on the topic of Healthy Habits. One of these nights, Pastor Bolden (or PB as we know him) told us that little changes add up to big changes and that’s how you conquer change and create new habits. Then we wrote down 3 things that we wanted to change on a card and turned them in before we left the service. Our homework was to go home and make a list of what little things we could do to help us achieve the three things that we placed on the card. I have no doubt that PB has been praying over our lists and this teaching has really stuck with me.

Here’s the profound example that PB shared. A plane was leaving Los Angeles, CA heading to New York, New York. If the pilot turned the nose 3 degrees south upon departure from LA, over time it would change the trajectory of the plane to land in Washington DC. Consider that something as small as 3 degrees could do that!

Now imagine, changing your lunch meal on Thursday one week. Then the next week changing lunch on Thursday and Friday. Or, going to the gym one day a week and walking for 10 minutes then increasing your increments each week or each time you walk. Over time you will have made small steps that add up to change over time.

I think we get side tracked like the memes below:

Baby steps are not mutually exclusive to changing your eating habits or working out. It could be about learning something new at work, a new language, a new hobby, arts and crafts, essentially anything! I was so moved by this teaching that I am taking baby steps in several areas of my life and I don’t feel overwhelmed. I feel successful. I feel like I can finally be successful moving forward because all of my baby steps will combine to make great progress!

I hope you count your baby steps as small victories and move forward!

#SDG

Not Yet, You Are Hidden

The last post that I wrote was, “Not Yet!” Immediately, I felt like there was so much more to write about that I told my niece, Brandi Boo, I was going to write a Part 2. Well, here it goes.

I cannot explain to anyone how I feel right now or what’s going on. What I know is that I keep crying. Everything makes me cry. I am sensitive, just a ball of emotions. Like all over the place.

To be a clear, I am ready! Or, at least I think I am. Ready for what? I am so glad you asked. Ready to thrive! But, I’m hidden and I know it. Being hidden has so much to do with building your faithfulness and consistency. It is also about helping you hone your skills and develop a confidence in your delivery.

I am a firm believer that there’s an undeniable breakdown before an undeniable breakthrough. Here’s a conversation between me & Boo.

First, let me say this. You can learn from anyone. I am at least 15 years older than her and she dropped these nuggets of knowledge and wisdom on me.

Second, Brandi Boo reminded me that no matter what it FEELS like, God is right here with me in the valley while He is preparing a place for me.

Third, how encouraging and truthful. Don’t fall into a comparison trap. None of us have the same destiny. While things may be similar, they won’t be the same.

Fourth, It’s my reminder that your gift will make room for you.

The advantage that I have over anyone else, is that I am ME!

Here’s where I am going with this post. If you are in a holding pattern, ask yourself what else is there for you to learn, grow or perfect? Are you being faithful in the place you are in? Are you showing up on time? Are you doing your work and not expecting anyone else to do it for you. You may be sharing your gift with 5 or 500 people, but are you consistent and dependable? What is your reputation? What do the reports about you say? Search yourself and see what you can do to become better in your personal arena.

Transparency moment as I measure Me against Me: I need to work on consistency. I have a great gift to share. The reports and my reputation are favorable. I have a list of things that will grow me and I need to make time to invest in them, in me. Do the work so that when the Lord makes it happen, I won’t be trying to find my way, I’ll already be on the path. The breakthrough is just around the corner, but for now, I’m hidden!

#SDG

I Am Good Soil

For the first time in over 10 years, I am in love with myself and I am walking in my purpose. I’m out of a stretch of low self esteem and heartbreaks. I wanted to wallow in my misfortune, But God kept giving me more things and more people to nurture and love. I watched family, coworkers, friends and frequent acquaintances benefit from my light, love and laughter. I was fighting internal hidden battlefields of the heart and mind, they were leaving me refreshed, happy and encouraged.

See, sometimes, the devil fights us because we are good soil and he knows that anything God plants in us will bear good fruit. Understanding that the enemy attacks at our greatest strength made me realize that I AM GOOD SOIL!

I count it on joy when I’m able to help others see the light where they only saw night. It was this act that helped pull me out of my own darkness and sprout. I was buried for what felt like an eternity. Giving so much of myself to others that there was rarely anything to give to myself. I yearned for stars in the sky and I kept telling the Lord, “I’m a bird, you gotta let me fly!”

At my core, I knew I was so much more than my pain and circumstances. I knew that there was purpose planted inside of me and if I could just crack the seed break the soils surface, everything would be beautiful!

I stopped conforming to what the world wanted and began to live free, but in radical obedience. I knew I could breathe on things and make them great. My love can mend the broken hearted. I am strong enough to carry someone else’s pain while they get their sparkle back. I know just the right amount of reckless talk to fire you up or when to be the breeze that holds you up.

After all, my tsunami had come to an end. I prayed, cried, praised and worshipped my way through. I chased after God and wouldn’t let go until He blessed me. I knew that there were seeds planted inside of me just waiting to sprout and I had to move past the darkness in order to produce.

I. Am. Good. Soil.

This is my reminder that as I step into my 38th year on this earth on March, 14, 2019, that I am amazing and I can do ALL things through Christ who lives in me!

SDG❣️

Puppet Master

In my 37th year of life I have learned that God is am amazing puppet master. As I sit here and start to write this post, I envision all areas of my life being held up by these thin translucent strings moving according to my obedience or lack thereof. I am imaginging that the elasticity of the strings depends on my willingness to move the way God has designed. Sometimes the masters handles tilt and my limbs movements are a result of my yielding, hesitation or me placing more weight on a particular area. Other times, the strings are weighed down so heavy by my bad decisions or indecision that they lose their elasticity or snap all together. In those cases, God, the ultimate puppet master has to come down and lovingly reattach me where I am broken.

“He is watching you from above, waiting for you to learn the lesson.”

Do you ever notice how situations in your life repeat themselves? Every time the lesson has to be repeated, it gets worse, more intense and hurts more. I have had that happen to me a few times in recent years and I swear that I know take lessons over pain. There is nothing worse to me than a bought lesson. I have made my life so much easier by learning the lesson on the first go round. When I look at the pretty fire in the house window, it’s a wrap. I am not going to touch any door knobs to see if they are hot.

“He’s preparing & strengthening you for what you have prayed for.”

Do you know how often we pray for things and then BOOM💥, at test/trial comes our way and we fold. We cry, ‘why me?’ Or think God is mad at us. When the truth is, we asked for more, increase, elevation. No matter how many times I’ve tried to fast track my dreams, I always get hit with the ‘hurry up and wait’! I have always desired a leadership role, but I shy away from conflict and conflict resolution. I am super sensitive and take all constructive criticism personally. That was until the Lord started giving me the desires of my heart, showing me the end game, but making me journey through the wilderness to get the prize. Guess what’s in my wilderness? A lot of conflict resolution. I can’t quit the blog, so when the feedback is less than positive or discouraging to me, I have to keep going. In my friendships I’ve been an understudy and when the wonderful humans in my life ‘read me’, I deal and make adjustments. In my fairytale relationship, I live real life where we talk though our differences instead of me trying to take flight.

“Learn the lesson, sit in silence, and give Him back His power.”

When you surrender and submit to God, He sets up a hedge of protection around you so that you succeed. I am currently in this stage of life! I am out here winning. I gave God my yes and He is opening doors and making ways. I learn to regroup and listen to the silence in which I find solace and direction. I repent and surrender daily. He has an amazing path laid out for me. There are people and things throughout this maze of life that push me back on the right track almost immediately, when I go astray.

Basically, I have learned that no matter how my limbs disobeyed or strayed away from those translucent strings that want to move me according to His will, once I surrendered, I always ended up exactly where He meant for me to be. Now, I let the fight to go against His will leave me, because I have no more time to waste!

Will you yield to God, the ultimate puppet master?